By Ada Bravo
Before getting started…
Many people who consider themselves to be a part of a polyamorous relationship, believe that marriage is a practice for monogamy. (Unmarried Equality) However, there are some people that do get married for reasons like enjoying the feeling of being a primary partner, sharing responsibilities and having someone to grow old with. If a couple is getting married, it is not at all about the couple deciding that they are the only ones meant for each other. It is more or so the promise to love each other and take care of each other. (Loving Without Boundaries)
Legally:
When looking at the way that this would work legally, being married to more than one person at a given time in the United States is prohibited. People who practice polyamory would not legally be able to marry more than one of their multiple partners. There have been cases where people have tried to fight for marriage equality for polyamorist. In 2015, a man from Montana applied for a marriage license in hopes that he would legally be able to marry a second women, but his idea was quickly shut down. (Washington Post) In the past, six supreme courts have upheld bans on polygamy. Another reason why the court thinks it would be hard to make multi-marriage legal, is that they would have to update laws for child guardiancy, splitting wealth, insurance coverage, etc. It is not believed that the law on single partnered marriage will change anytime soon, due to the publics low support of polyamorous relationships. One of the topics that Megan talked about in her lecture, “sexuality, inequality and activism”, she brings up the topic of marriage inequality being a legal discrimination, which applies in this case.
Socially:
Every polyamorous relationship is going to be different, just like any monogamous relationship. Some couples might want to marry only one person, some might want to be married to multiple and others might not even believe in marriage at all. In polyamory, there are hierarchical (having a primary partner) v non-hierarchical relationships. Megan and Paul talked a lot about how some people choose to have a primary parter, while others would rather not have a primary partner. Some people don’t want to have a lot of responsibility in a relationship. In order to do marriage legally what will happen in some cases is, people might marry their primary partner – which is someone that they prioritize to a higher extent – while having other relationships on the side. (More Than Two) If they did decide that they wanted to marry, they would most likely marry the person that they have a stronger connection with. This does not mean that they cannot pursue relationships with other people. Finding another partner aside from your primary partner, would not be considered infidelity in their poly relationship. If the case is that the couple were looking for a multi-marriage, it gets a lot more difficult because it cannot legally be done.
Breaking Relationship Norms 